#knew this was coming but i am so so sad

[septembersghost]

it cannot be underestimated, nor understated, what a tremendous loss tony bennett is, even at the age of 96, because he truly stood as the last of the great crooners, the sensational singers of the great american songbook. those standards, written by such illustrious composers as the gershwins, cole porter, irving berlin, rodgers and hart, jerome kern, johnny mercer, et al, and the voices who sang them - frank sinatra, dean martin, nat king cole, ella fitzgerald, judy garland, peggy lee, andy williams, johnny mathis (who is still with us), the list goes on - were an indelible part of the culture, and shaped popular music, and indeed music history, in a way that we simply will never see again. their like no longer exists, and as irreplaceable as the jazz standards are, the songs that everyone once knew, sophisticated and yet always accessible, complex and yet a joy to sing, are being lost to time, less preserved as scintillating and alive and more relegated as museum pieces, which breaks my heart. lady gaga working with tony so beautifully brought some of that music back to the zeitgeist, but there's a real sense of lack of preservation as to what that music means culturally. it is an essential musical heritage, part of the fabric that all pop was built upon. "legend" is tossed around a lot, but that is what they all were, legendary. tony was one of its best interpreters, and we were so blessed to have him for as long as we did, for his embrace of younger artists that did keep that music vibrant and fresh, for the legacy he leaves. i really do pray that as time goes by (you must remember this...), that music is passed down somehow, that those golden refrains are still heard.

[coughdropenjoyer]

The "letter unopened by Lucy Westenra" was a gut punch yesterday, but today's was even worse. The sorrow in Mina's voice was a hit right to my little heart, it was worse than getting caught by surprise. So tremendous voice acting, but y'all are killing me

[secriden]

There's something so wondrously momentous about Style only saying his "I love you" now, when he realises that all the secrets he was keeping from Fadel are already laid bare.

He says this a significant time after Fadel has said his (and, in the context of the wider narrative, after Kant and Bison) and for the character we have seen as prone to glibness, exaggeration and flippancy with his words, that feels incredibly intentional.

Because this confession was the only truth Style had left to give.

Fadel is finally done playing his (poorly thought out) game, done with his (already cracking at the seams) charade, done with giving Style more opportunities to pull at his heartstrings with his earnestness lies.

Fadel is demanding the truth, and tells Style exactly what truth he wants to hear.

And the thing is, there is truth in this: Style's motivations at the start were wrapped up in a deception specifically targeting Fadel.

I know we, as a fandom, harp on about Style "doing all that for a car", but something I would like us all to revisit is what Kant actually says to Style when he first asks Style to "hit on" Fadel:

Kant: You need to help me. You know I don't usually feel this way about someone. And then shortly later, after Style refuses: Kant: Hey, hold on. (Kant grabs Style's hand.) What do I have to do to for you to help me out? Should I pay you?

(Please forgive my inability to gif and watch Style's reaction to this.) Style is visibly surprised and intrigued. Kant seems to be serious about this request, and I think Style decides to test just how important it is to Kant by asking for the one thing he knows Kant will not give up.

Just look the expressions on Style's face. We didn't have the context of knowing Style back then as well as we do now, but this is the look Style gets when he's throwing out a challenge (to Fadel), when he's trying to ferret out some new insight (from Fadel), when he wants to see how someone (Fadel) will react to whatever outlandish (provocative) thing he's said or done.

And when Kant agrees, Style even checks again if Kant is serious about going through with it -- and it's this that convinces Style of the sincerity of Kant's request.

Yes, the car was a factor, and yes Style also wanted revenge and to humble Fadel, but at the centre of Style's motivation has always been a plea for help from a friend.

In episode 1: Kant: Under one condition. You have to make him head over heels in love with you. Style: I'll do it. Not just for the car, but someone like him needs to be humbled by someone like me.

But in agreeing to help Kant, Style really was damning Fadel to play the fool because Fadel's feelings (his heart) was a commodity that Style was fully willing to play with back then.

And there are aspects of truth here too. When Kant tells Style about Fadel (and Bison) being hitmen, Style decides he's done and wants out. Kant reasons that it's more dangerous for Style to break up with Fadel now, because it would look suspicious, but crucially this isn't enough to convince Style.

So Kant, once again, makes the plea to friendship and to his need for Style specifically, and it is this that causes Style to finally cave.

But in doing so, the things that Style agrees to are:

Kant: Work with me. Help me get more information about them. Once we get that, it's done. Captain puts them in jail, and we walk free.

So while Style may not be directly working with the police, he is working with Kant who he knows is working with the police. By proxy, Style is involved with the police, but in front of the empty pool, he makes it clear to Fadel just what that involvement actually entailed:

Style: Kant asked me to take you out so you could leave him alone and he could freely investigate. Fadel: What did he get out of it? Style: I don't know! That ain't my business! All I was asked of is to take you out.

And this, too, actually is true! Since finding out, Style has literally not discovered a single thing that could be remotely useful to the police investigation:

He's found out that Fadel likes to gym at night. He's found out that Fadel uses tenderloin in his burgers. That he runs in the morning before going to the market. That he attends a grief support group.

But these were all things Kant also already knew and could have given the police if it were in any way useful for the investigation.

Even his attempts to get Fadel to confess to his "other job" (something the police also already know) were clearly in service of wanting to save Fadel and/or convince him to give up the life of crime in the hopes that Fadel wouldn't have to be sent away from Style to prison.

But the truths are tangled up in misunderstandings and Fadel's own assumptions now; and also further tainted again by Bison's own hurt over Kant's betrayal. And Fadel literally cannot see -- because his eyes are filled with tears [see: @thisautistic's gifset + my tags] (good grief, Joong, the actor you are) -- the honesty Style is bleeding from the marrow of his bones.

Because the truth is that along the way Style has also found out that Fadel is a good older brother. That Fadel is still hurting and bleeding inside because his parents were murdered. That Fadel wears his favourite bands' make up in secret because he cannot bear the thought of other's judgement. He's found out that Fadel misses Style, wants Style, and hates himself for it. That Fadel is afraid to love. That Fadel is acutely aware of his own darkness and cannot comprehend an existence that would not involve someone (Style) rejecting it. That Fadel does not believe that 100% trust is possible, but that he will get himself drunk so that he can offer Style as much vulnerability as he can physically make himself give.

Because the things that Style did find out were all the ways Fadel's heart is soft and tender and precious and worthy worthy worthy of all the love Style has to give.

And Style will stand firm on this truth because this is the only thing he has left to give Fadel.

Because Fadel knows, now, all the ways Style was unworthy of his trust, but crucially has not figured out the most important truth:

Because in a very significant and profound way, Style is wholly deserving of Fadel's trust. Because in all the ways that Fadel has ever known he should want, Style actually IS worthy of his trust. Style knows the truth Fadel is hiding, knows what this man is capable of, knows the danger of being in his arms, knows the likely nonexistent future Fadel has to offer him -- and wants him anyway. -- Quoted from my meta post on the "One day, I'll be your 100%" line.

And as I alluded to in the tags on @yinwaring's insightful post: Style fully embodies the belief he espouses; because even in the face of a gun to his head and Fadel threatening to kill him if he will not admit that this, too, is a lie, Style refuses to give Fadel anymore dishonesty.

And this is because Style knows that the truth matters; now more than ever.

Because Style has had days to grapple with his worry after Fadel's disappearance. Style has had a week's worth of checking the diner only to face the regret he feels about not handling things differently. Style has had to recognise the terror of thinking he had lost something he never even knew he wanted in the first place.

And while Fadel had his realisation back in episode 4, Style never had to face this until Fadel vanished from his life and left a gaping hole in the shape of the absence of Fadel's smile.

So if this is what it takes, if this is the penance that Fadel demands of him, then it is a price Style is most happy to pay.

Because Fadel does not realise is that Style, too, now knows what it means to lose a love worth fighting for.

And in the war Fadel now feels compelled to wage against Style (because, yes, that's definitely still going on), the one damning thing Fadel has failed to recognised is that his only true weapon was leaving Style behind.

Which is why Style has already won. Not because Fadel's walls have crumpled again or because they don't still have a ton of things to talk through and work out (they really, really do), but because Style has already been stripped bare (and I mean this literally, like we all recognise THAT was the reason why Dunk is only in boxer shorts in that scene, right?? Like, I know we were joking about it, but seriously, that was so very intentional and a visual representation of Style being both stripped and, most importantly, freed from the lies he felt compelled to tell Fadel) and this means he has nothing holding him back.

And Fadel can wield his gun and his words and his anger and his hurt, but Style will die on the hill of the truth that he knew and understood and chose to love Fadel anyway, and saved this last confession for when he knew he could tell Fadel the truth without any lingering deception; and when the time is right, when Fadel is finally ready, Style will be there to welcome him back with open arms and, without any hesitation, an open heart.

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

I'd like to imagine Tim Drake just going around killing the people who've hurt him and his family (who are not also his family)

[naamahdarling]

.

[buboloboogie]

EPISODE 9 SPOILERS !!! EPISODE 9 SPOILERS !!!

Doodle page sneak peek ! My ass has having such a hard time drawing as of late so please take these little doobLz

[forestgreenlesbian]

.

[beaft]

everything is super uncertain and scary right now, so i'm trying very hard to not think about the future and just focus on the things that i want to happen. the concrete things.

i want to be in a space of my own that's clean and safe where i am surrounded by objects that are beautiful or meaningful to me. i want to be in a body that feels natural, a body that i can love instead of tolerate. i want my friends to be a short train or a bus ride away. i want to make art and write stories. i want to go on long walks in the summer and look at the animals and flowers. i want to sleep in a tent by the river. i want to make good food for myself and for the people i care about. i want to have a job i don't hate that pays me enough - not lots, just enough - that i can afford to be independent without constantly panicking over money. i want to feel at peace with where i am instead of agonising over where i'm not.

all of these things are achievable. maybe not all at the same time, maybe i can just have a couple of them, but they are achievable. i will not always feel this way. i will not always be trapped like i am now.

[esmes]

if you only knew

[moonshynecybin]

(source)

[marietheran-archived]

It's so odd though, being in Warsaw and seeing the innumerable plaques on every street that say "X number people were shot here on Date (Somewhere between 1939-1945)" and know that soon enough everyone who remembers will be gone and those plaques will be all that is left.

[the-almighty-bling]

Oof when Vee said “Goodbye P’San” I personally felt that in my heart. That was the saddest shit I have heard as of this moment.

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Fic idea: Before or during his Red Hood plan. A returned from the pit Jason Todd is determined to make it to his high school senior prom

WAIT EVEN BETTER, It'd be longer and harder to write but I really like the idea of Jason just casually going to highschool too, and maybe it leads up to the prom. He just shows back up one day. Does something that manages to keep media attention off of him. Would it be before Red Hood? would it encourage him to not don the helmet? Would he do it while Red Hooding? Would he finally get to join an after school theater club?

[flowercrowngods]

always so funky to be reminded that your parents might love you but they don’t actually like you very much

[seonghwasblr]

SVT coming to Europe for the first time ever in 9 years (not counting Gastonbury, cause that was sold out a year before they were announced, so carats didn't get a chance to go) and it's not even going to be ot13 should be a crime.. AND IT'S BECAUSE OF A SCHEDULE?!

[smokestarrules]

guess what I finished watching